Car is up and running once again. ($400 later) Luckily my friend owns the shop, sure an Audi shop would charged me way more.
ECM was fried

(APR stage 2 flashed)
Turns out that the first rebuilt starter was built wrong, the starter solenoid was rotated away from the engine causing the main positive terminal to touch the motor mount bracket which I didn't notice at first. When I connected the battery I saw a kinda hard spark right there I knew something was wrong so refrained from connecting the battery and went back to check the starter I bought from advanced auto (big mistake).
I got a different starter which had the right clocking on the solenoid terminals, installed it and everything came together very easily then I went and connected the battery (no hard sparking this time) but when I went to start the car I noticed the check engine light and esp light flashing and the car would not crank or start.
Something else I noticed was that the cooling fans start running as soon I would press the on button which is when I knew I screwed up big time.
I know some guys are asking themselves why I was asking about a starter relay/diagram and the reason is that I didn't know that the starter signal runs through ECM first, all the cars I used to working you can completely unplug the ECM and the starter would work even if the car didn't start.
I hope someone can learn from my lack of Audi mechanical knowledge even though I'm a very mechanically inclined individual.
But honestly I blame Advance Auto for not having good quality control with the re-builders.
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